BearsMountain: On Comments

July 30, 2008

On Comments

I removed my first comment from my blog today.

In the reading of my last post, "Anonymous" put a comment on my blog basically saying that I sounded "co-dependant." I'm not sure why this bothered me so much. I guess because I have been through so many years of Al-Anon, I know I am being co-dependant. I grew up in a co-dependant home, and could probably write a book on the subject.

I have been trying to get my head around this for months, while I appreciate comments; in fact, I love them, and get some of my greatest support and insight from them, this one felt like an attack. I looked at it for quite awhile, and then decided to delete it. I don't want to look at it. This is not because I am in denial.

Obviously, I am going through a very hard time in my life. I think that anyone who has been reading my blog knows this. I also feel that I am very self aware. I know I have been living in an atmosphere that is not great for me. That being said, I am trying to work my way out of it, in the only way I know how.

I emailed a blog friend this week, about a few things I have been feeling in regards to my blog, and I think for now, I am electing to moderate comments, and not allow anonymous comments.

Peace,

OC

8 comments:

Earth Muffin7/30/2008 5:08 PM
Good for you! No one needs negativity and judgment in their lives, especially when going through a hard time, as you are. I've deleted one comment so far too. It was in regards to a post I wrote about my kids and it was "advice" about my parenting that I interpreted as criticism of my parenting. Whatever...I just didn't need it and neither do you.
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GrumpyGranny7/30/2008 6:17 PM
I think that's a perfectly fine idea. I don't think my comment area allows for anonymous comments, although I don't think I set it up that way (if I did, I don't remember...senility, senility!). But, you're dealing with enough w/o having to get crap on your own blog!!

Hang in there!

GG
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R7/30/2008 7:06 PM
I completley understand what you are saying. Positive thoughts to you.
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Mama Llama7/30/2008 8:04 PM
Good for you, OC.

This is your space and you have all rights to protect it as you wish without feeling need to defend your choices.

I have also never commented "anonymously" on a blog because I feel that I should stand up and take responsibility for anything I have written, not hide behind anything more than my avatar allows. Anonymity, in academics, creates a very weak and often not very credible reference--nice to keep that in mind.

Be well, OC.
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sandy shoes7/30/2008 9:22 PM
Do what you have to. This is your blog... it doesn't have to be an open invitation for people to dump their opinions in your general direction.

Be well.
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Martini Cartwheels7/31/2008 1:41 PM
I don't see you as co-dependent. I see you as strong and independent. Just my 2 cents.
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Middle Girl7/31/2008 9:19 PM
It is quite easy for someone to sit on the outskirts and make pronouncements & judgements. Easier still to do so in a faceless, nameless manner. ::booo:: to that.

Yay to you, for *talking* this out, making your way towards those tough choices.

May Peace be with you...always.
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Teresa8/01/2008 12:09 PM
Woof

Don't worry about what Anonymous said. After all they didn't have guts to put their name did they? You just hang in there and everything will work out, at least it does for us dogs.
Desert Pups here just roaming around looking for lesbian blogs for our Mom cause she doesn't get out much even though we tell her she should. Good luck with everything and feel free to stop by our blogs, it would make our Mom feel better.

Woof, woof,
Scuba, Keiko, Norman and Toby
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31 & Falling -- Chris Pureka
Beauty & The Beast --Stevie Nicks
Blood and Fire -- Indigo Girls
Bridge Over Troubled Water -- Aretha Franklin
Cold Shoulder -- Amy Ray
Cross Over To Me--Caitie Curtis
Drift Away -- Dobie Gray
I Knew I Loved You -- Savage Garden
I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry -- Cowboy Junkies
If I Needed You -- Lyle Lovett
Imagine -- John Lennon
In Memory Of Trees -- Enya
Me & My Baby--Amy Ray
Rock & Roll Heavens Gate--Indigo Girls
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Sexuality -- KD Lang
The Weakness In Me -- Joan Armatrading
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Where I Stood--Missy Higgins
You Can Sleep While I Drive -- Melissa Etheridge
You're The Reason -- Antigone Rising

81 Things About Me

81 Things About Me

1. I'm blond.
2. I'm the oldest child.
3. I got my drivers license on my 16th birthday.
4. My favorite color is red.
5. I've never been skiing.
6. I never want to go skiing.
7. I went to catholic high school for one year.
8. My cat is 18 years old.
9. My car is always messy.
10. My kitchen is always clean, even when the rest of my house is a mess.
11. I spent years wearing acrylic fingernails.
12. I can sing the songs to every episode of the Backyardigans.
13. I can sing every song of the wiggles.
14. I have fat calves.
15. My favorite shoes are Birkenstocks and Keens.
16. I have a weakness for vanilla smelling anything body products.
17. I'm a burrito snob.
18. I'm a really good cook.
19. I love to cook.
20. I have a fire engine red Kitchen Aide mixer that I will never divorce.
21. I'm a Stevie Nick's fanatic.
22. I lived by the beach for 20 years.
23. I have a lot of Barry Manilow on my iPod.
24. I have a lot of Bon Jovi on my iPod.
25. I got my ears pierced for the 1st time when I was 10.
26. I have two kids.
27. I'm a terrible student.
28. I'm terribly nosy, and will google you.
29. My favorite fruit is watermelon.
30. My favorite TV show is Criminal Minds.
31. I love Sex and the City.
32. I'm trying to figure out who will actually go see SATC with me a the theater.
33. I've never owned a new car.
34. I'll probably never own a new car.
35. My pets all live to be extremely old.
36. I have a red car.
37. I nursed my son for 2 1/2 years.
38. I was only able to nurse my daughter for 4 months.
39. I still have boxes of albums and no turntable to play them on.
40. 50 is getting closer than I'm comfortable with.
41. I own a Ron Popiel Showtime Chicken Roaster.
42. I use aforementioned roaster at least once a week.
43. I used to be a chain smoker.
44. I quit smoking cold turkey. I've never had another ciggarette.
45. I'm a coffee addict.
46. I have really good hair.
47. I have really bad legs.
48. I love down comforters.
49. I love flannels sheets, but not with down comforters.
50. I used to be a fairly good potter.
51. I've had a computer since they were on DOS.
52. This is my 2nd Mac computer.
53. I'll never own a PC computer again.
54. My favorite junk food is Dorritos dipped in sour cream.
55. My favorite drinks are Tom and Jerry's.
56. I can't stand any kind of light colored beer.
57. I've seen a bear.
58. I used to be very shy when I was a child.
59. I'd kill for a Noah's Bagel.
60. I'm a night owl.
61. I babble in the car, I love to talk.
62. I never expected people to actually read my blog.
63. I am an expensive perfume whore.
64. I have a temper.
65. I work hard to control my temper.
66. I grew up in the desert.
67. I hate sushi.
68. I love Diet Coke.
69. I hate Diet Pepsi.
70. I made all my kids baby food.
71. My 1st car was a 76 Yellow Honda Civic Hachback with a black stripe.
72. I worked in an amusment park for the fee rides on the roller coasters.
73. I miss "MTV", the real old "MTV".
74. I have 3 piercings in each ear.
75. I have no tatoo's.
76. I really don't like chocolate that much.
77. I love gummi bears.
78. White gummi bears are my favorite.
79. I shave my legs every day.
80. I love Disco music.
81. I can drive a stick shift.