So I'm sitting here, procrastinating about what I want to do today. I want the kids rooms to be cleaned today, and then I am going to take them sledding. The thing is, I really don't want to clean their rooms, and would really rather get them outside sledding in the yard.
I just haven't felt much like writing lately, I think because of the holidays. It seems there is always something to do to get "ready" for it. I'm glad it's over. We had a nice day, lots of gifts for the kids, not so many for hubby and myself, a nice dinner and several days off with my kidlets.
I love having time off with them. It's fun. Yesterday, Small Son told me he wanted some "fresh cuddles", how cute is that?
The only thing is, this holiday season has been marred with, "is this the last one" we spend as a family? I was both ready to bolt and extremely sad. Hubby and I did have a good day yesterday, but. That being said, he continually irritated me at the same time. I know it's more about me being irritated with myself and my own seeming lack of ability to get myself out of this place I'm in.
My rational head says, "you are doing the right thing by waiting, by getting finances in order first", my heart wants to run away to the coast with my kids and never look back.
We had to go to this party on Christmas Eve at his best friends house. It's something we do every year, but this year, I didn't want to go, both because the kids are getting old enough, that I want them home on Christmas Eve, and because I knew it would be their family, and I'd be sitting there trying to keep my kids from destroying their house. I'm afraid my behavior wasn't very good. I was civil, pleasant, but I'm sure it was obvious to everyone I wanted to bolt. I know my face looks pissed when I'm not happy, and I'm sure I had a look on my face, oh well, cest' la vie.
I think I'm bailing on the cleaning for a bit, it's so pretty and the kids will be much happier with some exercise..
Peace,
OC
Cleaning can wait. You'll get a lot more out of sledding - the exercise now and the memories later. When you feel like cleaning, the dust will still be there.
ReplyDeleteI wish you a Merry Christmas and 2009!
ReplyDeleteI had a blast yesterday with my friends foster children ...instead of doing the family thing (again) I had been there Christmas eve. I went over to my friends house.
There is nothing wrong with new traditions and say NO to cleaning.
Weeee - I hope sledding was fun.
Once decision was made that we had to split and it took another 5 years for it to actually happen. There were moments much like you describe. Focusing on the kids and their events helped me.
ReplyDeleteSledding over cleaning, yes.
Peace.
364 days = still not long enough.
ReplyDeleteI am delighted to have this Christmas over with.
Happy 2009 OC.