Birthday Weekend is Over

The wind just started blowing outside.

Hubby's birthday is over. I gave him a Wii, the entire set up including extra controllers and Guitar Hero, and another game. I think he liked it. Once again though, I watched him interacting with the kids, and I didn't really care for how he was acting. I asked him point blank, if something was bothering him, and he said it was being "51".

I suppose he was just going through his own mental turmoil around it, so I let him go, although I did tell him I bought him the Wii not for him, but for something he could do with the kids. I think he got the point, as he went in and started playing with Small Son. Small Son is over the moon over it. I think I really like it too, though I didn't really try to play, as they were practically fighting over it, I'll get my chance I suppose. It did make me really happy that Small Son stayed up tonight with me playing tennis. He wore himself out, which was more than I had hoped for. I'm really impressed with it so far.

I'm not sure where I am mentally, I think I'm in grief mode. I know I will have to talk to him soon. I have too. After that, I don't know. My relationship with him is so up and down. He has his moments for sure, but I really do love and like him. I just have no desire to sleep with him, or live with him. I want my freedom back, at least as much as I can have it back with two small kids.

I spent a lot of time with Small Son today, and once again realized what a great kid he is, and how much I really just like him. He has developed a bit of a lying problem, and has taken to whining and hitting the floor in a tantrum when he doesn't get what he wants. I have been sending him to his room automatically for 5 minutes as soon as he hits the floor. I think it's starting to work. The whining, we are working on it. I've been having long talks with him about the lying, I'm hoping he gets the concept, but he is only 5. We will get there.

I've been increasingly wanting a kitten. I finally copped to the fact i my head, I don't want a dog, I want another cat. I'm read for another cat. I miss my old guy terribly, but I'm ready for a new little guy to love. Of course I want a cat that looks like my old guy and is a boy, but that is not a replacement thing, it's just that I happen to love Tabby's like I love black labs. I also greatly prefer boy cats over girl cats. Something about that lazy lion aspect that you get with a boy cat. This automatically assures me that I will find a girl cat that is not a tabby when I start looking. But then again, I've had more girl cats than boys, and I love them to pieces, it's just that they are much more high maintenance. We will see which kitty pops into my life I suppose.

I was reading about "geocaching" tonight. It looks really fun, and I might give it a whirl. I think it would be a fun thing to do with the kids, so if any of you out there have any experiences or insights about this, I would love to hear them.

I'm hoping for a nice peaceful day tomorrow. Most of my chores are done, as is the laundry. I don't have anything pressing to do tomorrow other than spend the day with my kidlets and chill out. I'm going to roast a chicken tomorrow, Small Son is begging me for a chicken.

I guess I'm going to need to start saving for a new Wii for when I leave...now that I have one, I don't want to let it go. I love that it's so physical, with the kids that is a wonderful thing. I broke a sweat playing tennis with small son.

Hope you are having a happy holiday weekend,

Peace,

OC